5 Tips To Avoid Parenting Burnout

by | Jan 12, 2021 | Islamic Psychology and Spirituality, Parenting and Family | 62 comments

Parenting burnout is real but not talked about as frequently as it should be. With kids at home and many working from home, parents are experiencing stress and exhaustion at alarming rates. Burnout can hamper our overall well-being and affect our relationships with everyone around us.

So how can we avoid parenting burnout? Read on to find out.

1- Me time:

It’s crucial to take out some time for yourself no matter how busy your life is. This step is non-negotiable. Don’t wait for a perfect day to start having your “me time”. The time is now. Don’t view this as a luxury or a reward that you give yourself. Make this an essential obligation in your life because when you fill your cup and are able to take care of yourself, you’re going to be able to be a better parent. At the Mindful Hearts Academy, I always emphasize that it is your responsibility to take care of your mental and emotional health. No one is going to do it for you. When you take care of yourself, you will be a phenomenal person, Inshallah.

2- Be present:

You need to be fully present. I know that some of you may be balancing work and home with very limited resources to help you. Whether you’re a stay-at-home mom or not a stay-at-home, moms work a lot. You need to figure out how to keep it together. It can get very tempting to multitask but consciously make sure to be present for your kids. It takes patience and perseverance to reach this state of mindfulness. This is what I teach at the Mindful Hearts Academy. By learning this skill, you can truly learn to improve all your relationships and recover from parental burnout.

3You don’t have to be perfect:

Silence the perfectionist voice within you. You don’t have to be perfect. Don’t expect perfection from your kids or loved ones either. A lot of times, we want our house to be perfect, the food to be perfect, the chores to be complete, etc. All of this ends up putting so much pressure on you. This will just lead to frustration and anger, which you would ultimately take out on your kids. Expecting things to be perfect will make you a very miserable person. It’s always better to have realistic expectations.

4- Have fun:

You need to have some guilt-free fun. You don’t have to feel guilty to indulge in some self-love and pampering. This will help you refuel. Make sure that you are spending on yourself, whether it’s exercise or taking a nap, or meeting up with some friends. Do it guilt-free. Don’t sit there and feel guilty about it. Tell yourself that you deserve these breaks. You deserve to have some fun. Balance your chores and expectations with your happiness and self-fulfillment. When you neglect yourself for prolonged periods of time, you will become very resentful and upset. This makes many people very bitter. They harbor animosity and jealousy which leads to unhappiness and discontentment in the long run.

5- Prioritize:

Let go of things that are not priorities. Don’t have too many things on your plate because it’s not going to help you focus on what’s important. You will be spending too much time and effort on everything all at once, leading you to achieve little to nothing, accompanied by high-stress levels. Say no to unimportant things so you have time for the important things in life.

I attended a Stephen Covey Workshop about 20 years ago. We were given a glass jar and asked to fill it with big rocks, little rocks, pebbles, and sand. Some people started off with the pebbles and then weren’t able to fit the large pieces. Some put one or two rocks in first and then they filled it up with the sand. The message was that you have to put the large pieces first. So, if you put the large pieces of the stones, representing your family, your religion, your work, your health, first, you will have more space for putting other things in, like the little rocks that represent your community and then fill it up with pebbles and sand, which are your least priorities.

I hope all of us can make the right priorities, choose our priorities correctly, and be able to avoid any kind of burnout and be at our best.

At the Mindful Hearts Academy, I will help you learn the art of living a life that’s in line with our deen and one that’s fulfilling and content inshaAllah. You can register and be a part of this amazing sisterhood, where your self-esteem will skyrocket. You will learn emotional intelligence, overcome depression, anxiety and find your purpose in life. Check out the Mindful Hearts Academy today

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62 Comments

  1. Saeed Anwar

    Assalamoalaikom my dear sister Halih Banani

  2. Mèhmèt Àsèf Alí

    Where the lips are silent….The heart has a thousand tougues…..

  3. Iftuu H Adam

    Yea it’s true

  4. Naila Mughal

    Mashaa Allah great tips

  5. Omisore-Bakare Maryam

    You are awesome sis.
    I’m really freaking out….very timely

  6. Nor Aini

    Waalaikumsalam. Alhamdulillah.

  7. Shireen Azizi

    Silence your perfectionist in yourself

  8. Kelmend Marikona Ismaili

    Exactly today I pray 2 Rakah just for sake of Allah to help me how to balance, react and to don’t yell my kids… May Allah bless you for every problem I have I address to Allah and in your page better then to ask someone who ack perfect family.

  9. Erum Ashar

    Unsa Shoaib

  10. Munawara Hussen Esmael

    May Allah bless you with long, healthy., and safe life with your family

  11. Jessica Abdulkareem

    Love you Sr Haleh for the sake of Allah. This is truly just what I needed to hear today

    • Haleh Banani

      Jessica Abdulkareem Thank you so much! Wohoo 7 week streak!

  12. Faiza Younus

    Love you for your really to the point true issues

  13. Faiza Younus

    Lady you are awesome

  14. Nadia Hawa

    Alia Hawa

  15. Nadia Hawa

    Ismaa Daniela Afzal

  16. Nadia Hawa

    Abrar Falasteen

  17. Nadia Hawa

    I need this today

  18. Charlotte Mabutho

    Rralize that “you’re enough” prioritise the important

  19. Fairouz May

    Shukran so much Haleh

  20. Zubeida Ottley

    So! So! true Being Perfectionist is my problem from very young age and Just can not break out of this web. Great topic to talk about.

  21. Saleha Abdullah

    Let go of things that are non priorities

  22. حمو حبيرش

    مشاء الله ربي يحفضك

  23. Saleha Abdullah

    Me time is not negotiable

    • Haleh Banani

      Isra Hashmy Thank you for the stars!

  24. Ateeba Waheed

    2 toddlers in house 4yr boy n 2yr girl

  25. Ateeba Waheed

    AoA, i love your lectures,had so frustrated day today, because my house is mess, n im perfectionist, n 0social life, thanks to covidmuch needed lecture right now

  26. Lilian Jaf

    I wanted to know how to deal with a 6 year old that difficult and doesn’t listen

    • Jessica Abdulkareem

      Ana María Elkhessassi Today I could definitely use that… some me time lol!

  27. Oyiza Mimi Mohammed

    Thank you for being there for us, may the Almighty Allah bless you

  28. Lilian Jaf

    Asalamualikum sister

  29. Zubeida Ottley

    Wahleikum Wahrematullahi Wabrakatuh. Alhamdhulilah nice to hear your lecture and see your smiling face. Subhanal’Allah. ⚘⚘

    • Haleh Banani

      Zubeida Ottley Thank you so much! I appreciate your sweet words.

      • Zubeida Ottley

        Jazak’Allah Kheiran.

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