Summary by Staff Writer

Regardless of what is happening around you, you can find inner peace. Even if your spouse isn’t listening to you or the kids are acting up or work is going nuts, you can find peace and serenity. Inner peace doesn’t come from any outside circumstances, it comes from inside your own mind.

You don’t have to wait for everything to align in your life first. There are always going to be challenges, there will always be some crisis or fire that you need to put out. Don’t wait for a time when everything is tranquil or you’ll never find inner peace. You don’t need to be at the beach or on a mountaintop. You don’t need to wait for the kids to be quiet or that project at work to be finished. You have a reservoir of peacefulness and serenity inside you, you just need to learn how to tap into those reserves.

I like to use the analogy of the ocean. On the surface the ocean is all crashing waves but, not that far below, it’s peaceful. You can choose whether you’re going to be tumbled around all the time but the waves. You can choose to stay there without control, being overwhelmed and helpless. Some people live their life like that, they’re constantly tumbling because of the waves of life. They never feel like they’re in control. Then there are those individuals that, regardless of what’s going on in their lives, they go deep down and tap into their reservoirs of peacefulness and serenity.

Even when your life is full with disturbing news and a lot of challenges, you can reach down and tap into your own reservoir of peacefulness and serenity where you will find peace too. You can even learn to have peace and tranquility without having peace and quiet. You don’t have to find a way to isolate yourself from friends and family, you don’t have to be on vacation, nor do you have to wait for the weekend. You can actually attain peacefulness in the midst of chaos and noise. You can find inner peace in just four steps.

Thought Control

Take some time to reflect on the thoughts you have about what is happening. For most people, 85% of the thoughts they have a negative. They think catastrophic thoughts most of the time. They think about how they hate their job, how life is horrible, or that they might get into a car accident. They jump right to worse case scenarios that cause nothing but grief and sadness.

Until you learn to control your thoughts, you’re not going to get anywhere. One of the first things that we address in the Mindful Hearts Academy, my mentorship program, is thought distortions. One of those distortions is catastrophizing, engaging in thinking about the worst case scenario. When you focus on thinking about what you don’t have and when you have a mindset that life is going to take you down, obviously, you’re going to create inner turmoil not inner peace.

Changing your mindset and having gratitude is going to bring you inner peace. Change your thinking to focus on what you have. You have so much. Focus on what you can control, that’s going to lead to inner peace.

Breathe

Learn to breathe through the difficulties. A good, deep breath lets you take control. It gives you the power and starts releasing tension. When you feel tense, when you feel stress, start taking deep breaths. Take a deep breath in, hold it and slowly breathe out. As you breathe you bring that inner peace.

When the children are arguing, when you’re stuck in traffic, when your boss is yelling, just take a moment and breathe. Don’t yell, don’t spank, don’t act out. Breathe. You’ll be amazed at the difference.

Visualize

Visualize your happy places. Think about the places that bring you peace and visualize yourself being there. I like to call it a virtual vacation. Even if it only lasts for three minutes, you will get the benefits of feeling peace right then and there. Picture yourself someplace you want to go or someplace that you’ve been to before that you enjoyed. Visualize yourself there, and it will have a powerful impact on your ability to have peace.

Don’t replay those movies where you’re sad and upset. Stop reliving all the times where you were angry, hurt, or betrayed. Reviewing these moments again and again just makes you miserable. Change the channel and play some beautiful memories or visualize yourself somewhere absolutely beautiful and regain that strength.

Self-Compassion

Does your inner turmoil come from what others are doing to you or what you’re doing to yourself? Most people have an inner critic that is so harsh, so difficult and so demanding of perfection. Tone down that inner critic that is saying that you’re not good enough, not smart enough, you’re not doing enough. If you are being that critical of yourself, you’re going to be in turmoil.

Develop self compassion, learn to A.C.T. The A stands for acknowledgement. Take some time to acknowledge the fact that you’re in a difficult situation. Recognize that you’re fed up, that the kids are being annoying, that work is stressful or that your relationship is draining you. Acknowledge what is happening, you don’t have to live in la la land wearing rose colored glasses. Don’t try to pretend that nothing is wrong, you need to acknowledge the fact that things are difficult and you’re overwhelmed.

C is about connecting. Everything gets so much better when you get a little bit of support. Whether it’s a friend, whether it’s a sister, whether it’s a brother, whether it’s a community member, whoever it is that can provide you a little bit of emotional support. Whatever it is that you’re going through, you’re not alone. There is surely somebody else that is experiencing, or has experienced, something similar. Whether it’s trauma, difficulty, or sadness, there is someone that you can find to connect with to support you.

Then for T, talk to yourself in a gentle manner. Talk to yourself with compassion, in the same way you would talk to a friend. Be gentle, turn off that inner critic and praise yourself. High five yourself in the mirror or give yourself a big smile. See the good in yourself just like you see the good in others.

This is the way to inner peace. First, really manage your thoughts. Whatever you’re thinking about is going to affect your emotions and is going to affect how you act. Second, breathe. Relieve stress and regain control with deep breaths. Third, visualize yourself in a happy place. Fourth is developing self compassion. ACT first. Acknowledge the situation, connect with support and talk kindly to yourself. Following these four steps will bring you inner peace, regardless of your circumstances.

Connect with Allah. When you have that deep connection with Allah, whether it’s in your (arabic), whether it’s in the constant dialogue that you have with Him, whether it’s reciting the (arabic), that sense of connection with the divine will give you that peace of mind and serenity.

This past year and a half has really shaken so many people up. You might be at a point where you are feeling that you need to make changes. You might be fed up with how you’re feeling. Your relationships might not be working. Maybe you don’t feel good about where you are or that you’re not achieving what you wanted to achieve. If you are ready to start doing the inner work, if it’s time for a mental restart, it’s time to join the Mindful Hearts Academy. Join our sisterhood and we’ll take you, step by step, through how to build your self esteem, how to have emotional intelligence, and how to really be the absolute best version of yourself.

https://www.themindfulhearts.com/